Wednesday, February 27, 2013

Self-Love

“To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance.” - Oscar Wilde

Are you satisfied with who you are? Most would say no, I would say never.
What exactly is self-love? Is it the utmost pride for oneself? Is it acceptance of one's being?
Too many of us find it difficult to love oneself when there are many flaws and standards unmet.
If you are one of those people who struggle to love themselves or unsure, High Existence lists the following as issues of self-love:
  • Being hyper-critical of yourself
  • Difficulty in loving others (because you must first love yourself)
  • Self-sabotage (not doing what you KNOW you should be doing)
  • Being self-conscious in social situations
  • Difficulty in fully accepting compliments
  • No accomplishment is ever enough, even temporarily
  • Not valuing your own time and priorities (being overly nice to others)

Personal Story

I have struggled with self-love for the longest time. In fact, I was not fully aware that I lacked self-love until researching about it because I was more so concerned by the term of self-hatred.
For some people, looking in the mirror may be a painful thing. They do not like what they see for many possible reasons. For me, I do not see the Taylor everyone else sees. I see an unrecognizable face. Still this day, I find it difficult to accept who I am as an individual.

Tips To Love Yourself

Evelyn of Abundance Tapestry compiles a list of ways to love yourself.
  • Fall in love with yourself
  • Eliminate Self Criticism
  • Be Kind And Positive
  • Acknowledge Your Effort
  • Trust Yourself
  • Be Truthful To Yourself
  • Grow Spiritually
  • Make Positive Affirmations Everyday
  • Express Gratitude
  • Nurture Your Dreams
  • Boost Your Self Confidence
  • Relax
  • Have fun
  • Look After Your Body
  • Learn To See Beauty
"In the midst of winter, I found there was, within me, an invinsable summer. - Albert Camus


Wednesday, February 20, 2013

Young Adults and Sleeping

 
 
Often I am asked what I do for fun and often the response is jokingly "sleep." But any individual that knows me well enough knows that I have a bittersweet relationship with the pastime of slumbering. Personally, I love sleep but I have terrible habit of oversleeping and the occasional negligence of it. Sleep is a means of an escape from reality and I am victim of resorting to such activity to "solve" (or maybe rather evade) my issues in the real world as well as the emotions storm raging in my mind.
 
Sleep is a necessity for the mind and body to re-cooperate but too little or too much sleep can lead to effects on your health. As young adults face more and more pressure and distractions, sleep is being affected. As one gets older, the "bed time" for sleep slowly postpones itself from 10 PM to midnight and possibly even later. Sleep becomes less important as responsibilities weigh higher and stress levels rise. Society's pressure to do well socially and in school along with today's technological toys have young adults reducing their sleep amount. This can impact one's emotional health and cause emotional instability.
 
As a freshman in college, I find that my sleep habit hasn't strayed too far from what I kept in high school. In fact I have become more of a night owl so to speak. In my senior year of high school, I would rotate between sleeping a lot to sleeping very little. It was a demanding school year and all-nighters were pulled and now I am accustomed to such stunts. 2 AM was once considered my bed time but now it has extended to 4 AM. Such a habit is certainly not the best option but it accommodates to the life that I lead and the schedule I have. At the end of the day though, it's a self-destructive habit. I get in between 5 and 12 hours of sleep, ranging day to day. My sleep environment is usually quiet and comfortable and I get decent sleep.
 
I am sure there are many colleges who do not get enough sleep or rather get too much. Meeting social and academic pressures of university life has led students to often adopt unhealthy sleeping habits (Knowlden). For me, hearing a person sleep at 10 PM is crazy. But kudos to those people because I will probably never be able to make that a routine. It is not that I am unaware of better sleeping habits but due to procrastination and lack of self-discipline (amongst everything else), sleep has been pushed further and further down the clock.
 
Sleep Hygiene (SH) is "a variety of different practices that are necessary to have normal, quality nighttime sleep and full daytime alertness." Sounds like common sense right? But in fact, "the majority of college students who practice poor sleeping habits are unacquainted with behaviors that promote healthy sleep" (Knowlden). Does this sound like you?
 
Insufficient amount of sleep can affect everything in your life - from relationships, to work performances, to cognative ability, and so on. Along with stress, deficient sleep can aid in depression which takes a toll on your emotional health and life in general.

Jodi Lobazzo Aman lists ways to get better sleep:
  • Make sleep a priority. We often take from our sleep time, whenever we run out of time in our day to get our things done. This is the quickest way to burn out. This is not a time saver! Tasks end up taking longer when we are sleep deprived.
  • Go to bed at the same time each night.
  • Wake at the same time each morning.
  • Start sleep deprived. Don’t sleep late in the morning and expect yourself to go to bed early to change your schedule. You must begin by getting up at the desired time. You can wake up when you are tired, but it is much harder to fall asleep if you are not tired. This is one of the biggest mistakes people make.
  • Nix the nap if you are already having a problem falling asleep or waking up. Nap only if neither of these are a problem.
  • Keep electronics out of the bedroom. Not only are these stimulating, but they give off electromagnetic energy.
  • Keep plants out of the bedroom. Plants give us oxygen during the day but take it in at night, so they do not belong in the bedroom. Plants in the rest of the house are beneficial, though!
  • Cut out caffeine. This may be obvious but so many people don’t make this connection.
  • De-clutter your bedroom. Even under your bed. It helps clear the mind.
  • No heavy or violent shows or video games before bed.
  • Exercise regularly, but not close to bedtime.
  • Have a good bedtime routine. Once you find something you like, do the same thing each night.
Adjusting your sleep schedule is one thing you can do to better your emotional health. After all, sleep is a luxury.
 
Works Cited
 
Knowlden, Adam P.Sharma, ManojBernard, Amy L. "Sleep Hygiene Of A Sample Of Undergraduate Students At A Midwestern University." American Journal Of Health Studies 27.1 (2012): 23-31. Alt HealthWatch. Web. 20 Feb. 2013.

Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Directions in Life

“The tragedy of life doesn’t lie in not reaching your goal. The tragedy lies in having no goals to reach.” - Benjamin Mays

Often times, life takes an unexpected turn. Whether good or bad, life in itself is like a twist of turns in a road.

For many people, the feeling of being lost or uncertain is common when it comes to directions in life. Whether you're just a high schooler with questions of the future, a college student with demands for a major, a college graduate with career pursuits or even an average joe or parent of three, the question of where is one going in life haunts us all. What do I want to with my life? Where do I see myself in two years? Five years? What is there for life to even offer?

The first thing you should know is that you are not alone. There are over seven billion human beings on this Earth, surprise surprise. Which means what you are feeling has been felt and dealt by others before. That's the beauty of human beings, some thing are universal. If you are feeling overwhelmed, talk to someone. Whether it is a friend or relative, it is a relieving feeling to let out your issues rather than pent it up. You'll also get to catch up with said person and even find that they may feel or have felt the same and get a few advice or stories.

Secondly and cliche as this sounds, but breathe. Take a moment out of of your day, out of your routine, and out of your thoughts and just take a long breather. In and out. There you go. We as individuals are often wrapped up in troubles and tribulations here are there, we end up neglecting ourselves.

It seems as though life has it set up that we need to know where we are going with our lives at all times. But this is not the case and it shouldn't be. It is okay to be uncertain of the future, because honestly, who is? Who knows what will happen tomorrow or ten years from now. There are too many factors to contribute to changes that may or may not put you off your track.

If you can accept the ambiguity in life, then you are on the beginning steps to understand the direction in life. There is no one set direction and you should not be simply limited to only one goal.

As the saying goes, Carpe Diem.